


The Path You’re On

by quickpixie



Category: Free!
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-02
Updated: 2014-02-02
Packaged: 2018-01-10 21:17:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1164617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quickpixie/pseuds/quickpixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin’s been been waiting all his life for this.  He thinks he’s finally ready.  </p><p>Or, Rin’s got lots of issues and he cries more than is healthy, probably, but people love him anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Path You’re On

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 30 Days of Rin Birthday Countdown.

In Australia, Rin’s roommate is an American named Josh.  He’s older than Rin and a little loud, but he’s bright and funny and kind.  He specializes in front crawl.  Of course.   He’s taken to calling Rin ‘little man’ because he says Rin reminds him of his little brother.  Rin isn’t quite sure he likes the nickname, but he guesses it’s okay.  It’s nice to have someone who looks out for him, anyway.  

He knows he doesn’t belong here and everyone else knows it, too.  He can see it in their eyes.  He’s weird and he never talks to anyone and he can’t keep up.  His times are awful.  How did he even get into this school?  He’s nothing special at all.  

But Josh doesn’t seem to care that he’s weird and he’s taken to helping Rin with his English in his own free time.  He’s always encouraging Rin.  He’s hopelessly optimistic and he doesn’t seem to get that Rin’s just a dumb kid who shouldn’t even be here.  He’s not worried about Rin’s times.

Rin comes out to him one night in a flurry of tears and shame.

He’s certain that Josh will hate him.  He’ll ask to switch rooms and he’ll stop speaking to him and he’ll warn everybody about that stupid kid that can’t keep up and how he doesn’t even like girls and no one will ever want to be his friend.

As it turns out, Josh is rather unfazed by the whole thing — even the tears.  His older brother is gay, he tells Rin.  He’s got experience.  

He’s so calm about it that it startles Rin into a strange state of zen.

Josh’s girlfriend is also serene about it.  “You,” she says, petting him like a cat, “are going to be fine.”  (Experience or not, Josh doesn’t really know how to deal with crying kids.  Calling Trina turns out to be an excellent idea.)

Rin wants to protest because how would _she_ know?

“You’ll get there in the end,” she tells him, “when you figure out who it is you love.”   

(Years later, he’ll remember just how much he talked about Haru and die a little inside.  God, he was so obvious.)

**_Love is coming_ **

Telling his mother is the hardest thing he’s ever done.  Just before he moves back to Iwatobi, when he comes home for the New Year, he sits her down, just the two of them, and tells her there’s something important he has to tell her.

He’s never been so scared.  His mother has never been typical, but Iwatobi is a small town and his mother was raised in a conservative home.  He doesn’t know what he’ll do if his mother— if his mother doesn’t love him.  

“Mom,” he says, choking on the word.  “Mom, I think I’m gay.”  

He’s staring at his shoes.  He’s a coward; he can’t meet his own mother’s eyes.

“No,” she says, and he looks up.  He’s shaking all over.

“No,” she says again.  “You don’t think; you _know_.  I’ve known, too, since you were a little boy.”  She reaches out a hand and lifts his chin so that she can look him in the eye.  “I love you,” she says, and holds out her arms. 

He lets his mother pull him into a hug as if he were a child again and somehow, things seem just a little less awful.

"I’ll never be in love," he mumbles into her shoulder. "I’ll be alone forever."

His mother laughs out loud.  “That’s ridiculous!”  She gives his shoulder a shove for emphasis.  “Who wouldn’t fall in love with you?  What an absurd thing to say.”  She pauses.  “You really are a teenager, aren’t you?” she says wryly.  

Rin can’t decide if registering his offense is worth letting her see the blush on his face.  

"But," she says, her voice turning serious, "you know that’s not true, don’t you?  You know that you’ll fall in love someday and you’ll be happy?”

"No," he mutters miserably, “I won’t. No one is ever going to love me."

He can feel the tears coming again and he wants to die.  What kind of son is he, so weak he can’t stop crying in his mother’s arms.  

But his mother is nothing if not determined and she pushes at his shoulders until she can see his face. 

"Rin, I know it seems like that, but," and she smiles to herself like she knows something he doesn’t, "love is coming," she says. "It’s on its way."

Rin is too scared to ask her what she means. 

**_Love is coming_ **

Being with Haru — with all of them — is something he was sure he’d never have again. Some days he can’t believe they’ve let him back into their lives so easily.  He knows he doesn’t deserve it after the way he treated him— them. 

But there are joint practices now and he suspects Gou has something to do with this. (Gou and fucking Mikoshiba.  As if he’s in it for “team building and sportsmanship.”  He just wants to hang around Gou.) 

Eventually, the joint practices turn into practices with just the four — five, now — of them.   He and Haru are slowly falling back into each other’s orbit. 

It’s almost like it was so many years ago, for the team, but it’s better now.  Everyone is more settled.  Well.  Rei and Nagisa are debatable, but for the most part, it’s quieter now.  More still.  The ground seems steady beneath his feet for the first time in a long time.  

But Haru is still different somehow.  It’s not just that he’s grown up — they all have — but he’s changed in a way Rin can’t quite put his finger on.  It’s like they fit together now, more than they did even when they were children.  They’re not cutting themselves to pieces on each other’s sharp edges anymore.  There’s a seismic shift taking place between them and no one else seems to have noticed, but he can feel it in the water when they swim together, can see it in the little smile Haru smiles when he thinks no one else is looking.

His heart feels like an ocean, wild and deep and open.  Something is coming; he can hear it on the waves.  He can wait, though.  He’s never felt so sure.  He’s ready.

The first time he kisses Haru, he realizes.  Yes, this.  This is what he’s been waiting for. 

**_Love is coming_ **

On a day like any other, an ordinary, boring day, Rin realizes that love has snuck up on him.  Love has arrived and caught him unawares.  He’s so stunned that he doesn’t even notice as he sinks to the floor, weak-kneed and glassy-eyed.

Love is here.  It’s in this house, in this home, here where Haru laughs and sighs and sleeps.  

He’s sitting in the middle of Haru’s kitchen staring off into space when Haru comes down from his morning soak.  When he drifts back into awareness, Haru is prodding him with his foot.

“Why are you on the floor?” 

He stares up at Haru.

~~ **_Love is coming_ ** ~~

“I love you,” he says breathlessly.  

**Love is here.**

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is the part where I ask you to please come talk to me on tumblr. So, PLEASE come talk to me on tumblr. You can find me [here](http://qpfandom.tumblr.com). This is my brand spanking new anime blog because nobody I know watches Free! and I have no one to talk to. It's all very tragic. (Okay, I have changed the name of this blog about fifty 'leven times now, so if you aren't sure, I track quickpixie.)
> 
> As you can see, I am in need of Rin friends, so come cry with me maybe?


End file.
